Regrets in Spanish — Arrepentirse, Lamentar and How to Say I Should Have

Key takeaways

• The core verbs for regret in Spanish: arrepentirse de (to regret — personal responsibility), lamentar (to regret/lament — situations), sentir (to be sorry — conversational).
• "I should have": Debería haber + [infinitive] — Debería haber llamado antes (I should have called before).
• "I wish I had": Ojalá hubiera + [past participle] — Ojalá hubiera viajado más (I wish I had traveled more).
• Arrepentirse is reflexive: me arrepiento, te arrepientes, se arrepiente.
• Regret about NOT doing: Me arrepiento de no haber + [past participle].

You want to tell a Spanish-speaking friend you regret something — but you're not sure whether to say me arrepiento or lo siento or lamento. Or you're writing a message and realize you don't know how to say "I should have told you sooner." Or you want to express that nostalgic, open-ended feeling of I wish I had done things differently — and nothing you know quite fits. You can learn Spanish through step-by-step lessons built for real progress.

Expressing regret in Spanish is a nuanced business. The language has multiple verbs and structures for different kinds of regret — personal remorse, sorrow over situations, wishes about the past, and hypothetical alternatives. Each one carries different emotional weight and grammatical structure.

This guide covers the main Spanish verbs for regret, how to say "I should have," the Ojalá hubiera structure, phrases for different kinds of regret, and how to talk about "no regrets" in Spanish.

The main verbs for regret in Spanish

Arrepentirse — regret with personal responsibility

Arrepentirse is the most personal of the regret verbs. It implies you made a choice and now feel remorse about it. It is a reflexive verb: me arrepiento, te arrepientes, se arrepiente, nos arrepentimos.

Structure: arrepentirse de + [noun or infinitive phrase]

• Me arrepiento de esa decisión. — I regret that decision.
• Me arrepiento de haber dicho eso. — I regret having said that.
• Me arrepiento de no haber llamado antes. — I regret not having called sooner.
• ¿Te arrepientes de algo? — Do you regret anything?
• No me arrepiento de nada. — I don't regret anything. / No regrets.
• Pruébalo — no te arrepentirás. — Try it — you won't regret it.

Grammar note: Arrepentirse is a reflexive verb, which means it requires a reflexive pronoun that matches the subject: me, te, se, nos, os, se. The structure for regretting an action uses arrepentirse de + haber + [past participle]: me arrepiento de haber mentido (I regret having lied). For regretting NOT doing something: arrepentirse de no haber + [past participle]: me arrepiento de no haber viajado más (I regret not having traveled more).

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Lamentar — regret and sorrow over situations

Lamentar is used for sorrow about situations — often things that happened to you or others, rather than choices you made. It's more formal and detached than arrepentirse.

• Lamento mucho tu pérdida. — I'm deeply sorry for your loss.
• Lamentamos informarle que... — We regret to inform you that... (formal)
• Lamento no poder ayudarte. — I'm sorry I can't help you.
• Lamento lo que pasó entre nosotros. — I regret what happened between us.
• Es una situación que todos lamentamos. — It's a situation we all regret.

Sentir — the softer, conversational regret

Sentir (to feel / to be sorry) is the most conversational way to express regret — it's empathetic and warm. In this usage it works like a verb meaning "to be sorry about."

• Lo siento mucho. — I'm very sorry. / I really regret it.
• Siento que las cosas salieran así. — I'm sorry things turned out this way.
• Siento no haber estado cuando me necesitabas. — I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me.

Language note: Lo siento is the most common way to say "I'm sorry" in Spanish — but it literally means "I feel it." It expresses both an apology and a feeling of regret. Perdón and disculpa are more specifically apologies. When expressing deeper remorse about a past action, me arrepiento carries more weight than lo siento.

How to say "I should have" in Spanish

Expressing what you should have done is one of the most common forms of regret in any language. Spanish uses the conditional perfect of deber.

Structure: Debería haber + [past participle]

• Debería haber llamado antes. — I should have called before.
• Debería haber estudiado más. — I should have studied more.
• Deberías haber dicho la verdad. — You should have told the truth.
• Deberíamos haber llegado más temprano. — We should have arrived earlier.

Alternative structure: Tendría que haber + [past participle]

• Tendría que haber pedido perdón. — I should have asked for forgiveness.
• Tendrías que haber pensado antes de hablar. — You should have thought before speaking.

Ojalá hubiera — "I wish I had"

One of the most expressive regret structures in Spanish uses ojalá (I wish / if only) with the past subjunctive. It expresses a wish about the past — something you wish had happened but didn't.

Structure: Ojalá hubiera/hubiese + [past participle]

• Ojalá hubiera viajado más cuando era joven. — I wish I had traveled more when I was young.
• Ojalá hubiera dicho lo que sentía. — I wish I had said what I felt.
• Ojalá hubiéramos llegado antes. — I wish we had arrived earlier.
• Ojalá lo hubiera sabido antes. — I wish I had known sooner.

Grammar note: Ojalá comes from the Arabic inshallah (if God wills it) — a linguistic trace of the Moorish presence in Spain. It always triggers the subjunctive mood. For wishes about the present: Ojalá estuviera aquí (I wish she were here) — past subjunctive. For wishes about the past: Ojalá hubiera venido (I wish she had come) — past perfect subjunctive. Both express unfulfilled wishes, but one is current and the other is historical regret.

Si hubiera — "If I had"

Another core regret structure: Si hubiera + [past participle]... habría + [past participle] expresses a hypothetical past — what would have happened if things had been different.

• Si hubiera estudiado más, habría aprobado el examen. — If I had studied more, I would have passed the exam.
• Si lo hubiera sabido antes, habría actuado diferente. — If I had known sooner, I would have acted differently.
• Si hubiera escuchado, no estaríamos en esta situación. — If I had listened, we wouldn't be in this situation.

Common regret phrases and expressions

How to practice regret structures in Spanish

• Use arrepentirse in daily reflection: Practice using me arrepiento de to describe small daily choices — me arrepiento de no haber dormido más (I regret not having slept more). The reflexive structure becomes automatic through repetition.
• Practice the ojalá structure: Write three things you wish had been different — Ojalá hubiera... — to practice the past perfect subjunctive in a meaningful personal context.
• Learn debería haber as a single chunk: Treat debería haber as one unit — a fixed expression of past obligation — rather than analyzing each word separately.
• Watch Spanish content about personal reflection: Interviews, telenovelas, and personal vlogs in Spanish are full of regret vocabulary used naturally.
• Use AI conversation practice: Apps like Promova offer conversation practice that includes emotional and reflective contexts — where regret vocabulary appears most naturally.

Summary

Expressing regret in Spanish uses three main verbs: arrepentirse de (personal remorse — reflexive), lamentar (sorrow over situations — more formal), and sentir (conversational regret — lo siento).

The key grammatical structures are: Debería haber + [past participle] for "I should have," and Ojalá hubiera + [past participle] for "I wish I had." Both use past forms of the verb. The conditional Si hubiera... habría... expresses what would have happened if things were different.

For "no regrets": No me arrepiento de nada (I don't regret anything) or sin arrepentimientos (without regrets). For deep remorse: el remordimiento is stronger than el arrepentimiento. Knowing when to use each verb — and the grammar they require — is what makes regret vocabulary feel natural rather than translated.